Boy, Was I Wrong.

Happy 1/2 Birthday, Little Guy!!!

WOW. Lakers turned 6 months this past weekend. He was just born yesterday, wasn't he? Nothing beats this Motherhood gig. I believe I'll keep it. You can't place a value on it, a number, or express it verbally. You simply can't know, until you become a Mother, the joy it will bring to your life. It's UNREAL. And to think, I once said, "My life will not change much once I have a child." Who did I think I was?

I've logged more miles on his rocking chair than in my car over the past 6 months, but I don't mind. The girl who loved to whip down the highway, chugging' coffee, jamming or blabbing on the phone at 80 mph, is long gone. If he's in the car, it's the speed limit and no cell phones. We still jam out though. I haven't minded being out of the social, political, or entertainment arenas, either. My People magazine subscription will need to be cancelled since I no longer spend Friday nights catching up on Brangelina. (Did they have their twins yet, BTW?) I think that subscription fee would look great on my feet, since I haven't had time or cash for a pedicure lately and could use some cute shoes. Shopping. What's that? And, money. Who has any?

We now drift off to sleep with the sounds of The Cure, Bob Marley or Coldplay (check out Rockabyebabymusic.com) Lullabies twinkling across the hall. I was the woman who could have no sounds at nighttime. And lights. The hall light stays on, glaring brightly into my eyes, yet I manage to sleep. The "no lights" rule blew out the window the first night he came home.

I was also the woman who said, Lake will never sleep in our bed. Right. There is nothing better than bringing him into our room about 5 am, and spending the last few hours of sleep snuggled up next to his little booty. When he stretches, grins, and snuggles up to me, forget it. I'm game to let him stay there until he's six.

Miss Social has also learned to say "no" to things. Not all things, but we're learning to pick and choose. We're going out on Saturday, July 12th, so I'll need to arrange for a sitter. That's been a huge adjustment. I actually need to find sitters. (We could always just leave Jackie Cooper home, but child protection services would frown on that if we left Lake, don't you think?) We still plan way ahead, but we're staying home more than going out. It's a little love nest.

I'm not the only one who said funny things prior to parenthood. John said he was going to take the highchair down after every meal, so it wouldn't be in the way. Well, we broke it out this weekend, and it hasn't moved. It's got it's own little spot at the breakfast nook table. And, it doesn't take away from the "design" of the room, either. We are trying, however, not to lose ourselves completely in our new roles. You'll be proud to know we've already been on a plane, sans Lake, and will be going to Jamaica for Bodi's wedding in November. We aren't taking him. It's still important to savor us. We spent the last 6 years of our marriage building our bond, we do need to maintain that focus. And, we're still going to the Dave Shows this summer. Both nights. It may get fratty. Grandma & Papaw will have Lakers for the weekend. It'll be old school.

All in all, it's been a complete overhaul. I'll take it. It's truly rewarding to see his little mug every morning, smiling brightly, cooing for the world to hear. They grow and change so fast. I'm trying to memorize the moments as they happen.

I just wanted to let everyone know how wrong I was. All you mom's knew already, you just wanted me to find out for myself.

Stripped

John & I recently begun hosting a House Church (or small bible study/community group) for Common Ground Christian Church. Collectively, we decided before we actually started doing the bible study portion, we'd spend time each week with an individual in the group sharing their background. It's an open forum. Our goal was to get to know each other on a deeper level.

We've had about 26 people come in the past several weeks. (And about 6 children) Most people don't know one another. There are no preconceived notions. There are a few groups of friends spread throughout, but as we are forming from "scratch", most of the faces are new to each of us. We've grown both through the church and internally, and all share a common goal: We are actively seeking God.

Have you ever placed a group of people in a room, who barely knew each other, and asked who would like to speak about themselves next week? Their story can be anything it needs to be. It can be about their childhood, or their upbringing in church, or their lack of, or where they are today. It can be the relationship with their parents, or an opportunity to divulge their weaknesses, or their dreams. It's a tough assignment.

Basically, I look around a room full of people, at some who are confident, and at others who avoid my eyes, and I say to them "strip". Of course, I don't say that verbatim. But, it is indeed what we're asking. We're asking them to let down their guard, make themselves vulnerable, and open their lives to strangers. I'm asking them to shed any insecurities they may have, and step out in Faith, that those here won't cast stones.

I've been AMAZED at what I've heard. Some people have had a fairly "easy" life. They haven't had too many letdowns, or had a boat load of disappointments. They appear fairly intact. Others have cracks. It's an eye opener, even in a community this small, how people have been touched by life's different seasons. The issues run the gamut. I've sat here, with mouth open, literally gasping at some of the things I've heard. Some of our discussions are heavy. They are far from light & are a far cry from a fairytale.

Yet, here they sit. Week after week, stripping away the things that tie them down. It's not easy. Trusting others, and building solid relationships, is often hard to achieve. I can't help but think, however, that God is bringing each of us back for a reason. It's our trust in Him that is allowing everyone to open themselves up. He's pulling, slowly, at each of us to share at the right time. Whether their stories reflect a bright and shiny past, or one that was dull or broken, they all are equally beautiful in His eyes. As Christians we should be able to recognize that beauty as well, and accept all that we hear with open ears.

Mama's Cookin'

I've never enjoyed cooking. Ever. I despise it. In fact, I'm not sure I've ever even boiled an egg. My cooking prowess includes: tacos, cereal (as in Crispix), and egg casserole, but only at Christmas. You'd think John would've have starved already. However, he knew going into this marriage , that my domestic skills were far from refined.
And to think, I come from a cooking family. My Mom cooks. My Grandmother cooks. I physically crave my Granny's biscuits and sausage gravy, or her homemade ham & soup beans. I'll gladly make the 460 mile trip to Blackwater, VA. just to have a meal with my grandparents. I'd pack the car tomorrow.
Now, when I say they cook, they COOK. Every meal is practically made from scratch. Biscuits, stuffing, pie crusts, you name it. They believe in the old addage, the food needs to "stick to your ribs." We're talking mashed potatoes, ten pounds of chicken, brocoli salad, homemade desserts, veggie trays, homemade macaroni, and garden salads. And that's lunch. For four people. It's old school cooking, for sure.
Ever since we've had Lake, I've had this nagging feeling I need to learn to cook. Pre parenthood, John and became accustomed to take-out (we even have a binder full of take-out menus, categorized by the area of town, and whether or not they deliver). We'd grab sushi on the way home, or go out to dinner. We were spoiled, I know. We'd gotten used to being "dinks" (double-income, no kids). Lake changed that status real fast. We're now 1 & a 1/2 incomes, with a baby. Nothing keeps you out of restaurants faster than that.
So here I am, wondering what I should do. Before long, Lake will be no longer on milk, but eating food from the table. I can' t feed him Crispix every single day. I blame my Mother for this, actually. She spoke some magic words that sealed the deal a few weeks ago. I was complaining about not knowing what to have for dinner, and not wanting to cook anything, yatta, yatta, yatta. She said, "Don't you want Lake to grow up and want his Mama's cooking?"
That one sentence stuck in my head. Yes, I do want him to want his Mama's cooking. I want him to come home from school wondering what's for dinner. I want him to ask for seconds. I want him to bring his friends over for dinner. And, when he's in college, Mama's cooking will hopefully call him home, when he's completely burnt out on pizzas, hot dogs, and dorm food. I can't believe the power her one sentence held over me. It changed my entire outlook on cooking. Women have been feeding their families since the beginning of time. It only makes sense that I too, finally join the ranks.
The biggest benefit in learning to cook today, vs. when our parents did, is the Internet. No longer do you have to collect cookbooks, you can just join one of the thousand free cooking websites out there. The one I'm using is AllRecipes.com. I love it. It tells you all of the nutritional information, and even allows you to print your recipes out on index-sized cards. You can customize a shopping list, which tells you all the ingredients you need to purchase (with a little check box area to mark off) for each of your recipes. It's fabulous. Hold onto your hats, kids, I'm hitting the kitchen.
I chose 4 recipes to start with a few weeks ago. It's a HUGE difference trying to find food in the grocery store that isn't processed. I was in Meijer for 4 hours. Yes, 4 hours. I couldn't find anything. All these fresh ingredients, herbs, and items from the meat counter took me forever to find, as I usually only grace the frozen food aisle. (The meat counter always flips me out, and the seafood counter is worse!) I never know what to ask for. But, since I was in Meijer for four hours, the meat counter was closed before I even got to that. I know for next time, right? And the lobsters, seriously. It's so very sad. I really wish they wouldn't sit live lobsters out for the pickin'. You know they know they're on death row.
My first dish wasn't too bad. It was a smoked salmon pasta salad, with blue cheese dressing, tomatoes & cucumbers. (Note to self: cucumbers make me ill.) It wasn't a complete flop, which surprised me and John both. However, I did have to cook the pasta 2 times, because I followed the package directions, and it took way longer for the pasta to cook than the package said.
Over the last few weeks, I've been spending hours in the kitchen. Thankfully, I have my mama to help me, so I haven't burnt the house down yet. I've learned how to julienne a pepper, crush fresh garlic, and work a food processor. The best part, is I'm learning from one of the best cooks out there. My own Mama. Now, don't get me wrong, I have no intention of cookin it old-school, like she does most of the time. Our preferences lean more toward fish, and Mediterranean dishes. We like Italian and grilled items. We're trying to adopt a healthier lifestyle.I don't see me making a full-blown turkey with all the fixin's quite yet. I've realized, too, that it's okay not to cook the same types of food my mama and grandma both are famous for..the hearty, heavy, home cooked meal. I think the most important part is that it comes from me, the new Mama on the block, and it comes from the heart.